While I was knee deep in office debris, I also realized that sometimes I can feel this way about my horsemanship goals too. Are there tasks, or areas that are calling out to be worked on first before we can get to our fun list and become in the words of BHG- cool, calm and decluttered? And don't misunderstand, my horses and I have no problem ditching our plan for the day and have some good old fashioned fun spontaneous play. And I don't mean that I am putting goals before principles but rather that I need to take a moment and really look at where we are at in relation to the bigger goal. Embrace where we are at instead of thinking about what we still haven't accomplished. And begin there. Perhaps it is all these books I am reading in preparation for the 1 Star Instructor course that's got me thinking about truth, transparency and trust, or my own desire to be super prepared and get the most out of that adventure, my old damned determined ambitious side was poking her head out! LOL. She really craves knowledge and organization. And she can sometimes be a real pill. :P
So I had to ask myself, what is hanging me up or holding me back? What am I secretly obsessing over? Ok here it is...... submitting our Level 3 Freestyle Audition. There I said it......it's out there. I admit that I would liked that to have been done, passed, checked off by the end of 2010. I felt I had plenty of time..... ah but that was people time not my horse's time. And my friends, there is my second confession, treating my horsemanship like a "to do" list that I was longing to check off! Good grief! I know that my horse & I have some rather important mental, emotional and physical things to sort through in regards to riding truly in free-style... the kind of free-style that I dream about .... riding bareback and bridleless ....on the beach no less. Now I know that is not part of the audition, but it is part of the pursuit of my dream. Some of the important ingredients surfaced during our Fast Track experience last June while others have been around for awhile and thankfully my mentors help me sort through them and have really given me permission to slow down and become fascinated by them. Really it's just a little nagging feeling of falling behind the goal of the "green string", with a bit of impatience thrown in -when will I get back to the recombine part and play with our freestyle audition?
So I acknowledged that with a little re-org of my time I could satisfy my desire for more knowledge, tackle some of the more glaring organizational needs which would result in more relaxation and free up my playful imaginative side..... and then I'd be in the right attitude to start to write down my horsemanship goals, aspirations and dreams for 2011. Yes that's right.... the first Key to Success...... Attitude. It's the process not the product.... it's not about the goals. LOL! The list can go on. What my friends have you learned about yourself, your attitude, your feelings, your response to writing down your goals, dreams and aspirations for the new year?